Seesaw

...is infinitely preferable to teeter-totter.

A teeter-totter sounds like a teetotaler; the latter must keeps his or her balance as to not fall off the wagon.

Yikes, I am weakening!

This reminds me of the matrimonial ads I perused in India. This charmer of a man sought a "tall, fair, slim, beautiful, vegetarian" girl, while he expertly described himself as "tall, very fair, Rajasthani, 40-something, vegetarian, a teetotaler, and morbidly obese."

Points for honesty.

"Teeter-totter" also sounds like "tater-tot," my least favourite form of potato, after waffle fries. I once had the best plate of fish and chips in Sedona, but it was served with waffle fries! So, I resorted to stealing my parents'. That place had very good hot chocolate, as well.

I once got two massive bruises, in the shapes of my fists, from a seesaw. I guess my overgrown thirteen-year-old self kind of deserved that.

It's funny, though. Seesaws start to lose their appeal once you hit a certain height, as they cease to offer thrills. Yet, seesaws begin to strengthen their appeal once you hit a certain age, as you're reminded of the thrills you once got from them, when you were as tall as your bathroom sink, and not now, when the bathroom sink is as tall as your knees.

That is why I favour swings and tires. You can fly high or get really dizzy, take your pick. And then crash into the seesaw.

So, Thoughts?

As you may be able to tell, I changed the template/scheme of this blog. A lot.

I am torn between the old way and the new. Damn it. I should've taken a screenshot before I changed it!

Anyway.

I liked the simple, BLACK-ness of the old format. Images also seemed sharp against it. And it complemented my preferred Courier font.

But, I decided to change it since Blogger came out with a new way to design blogs.

It seems a bit crowded to me. I like the colours, but they're also a drawback. There are a lot, and some have trouble showing up against the various backgrounds. I tried to remedy it to the best of my ability, but I couldn't fix the 'days left to vote/how many votes' underneath the polls without changing the text colours of the whole page.

I might change it back or find a nice compromise. I miss the stark blackness. Either way, however I need to spend a lot more time with the design feature.

Thoughts, suggestions, comments, criticisms, ideas, pro/con lists are demanded! On any aspect of the blog.

And you don't have to be clever, and please please please don't post any comments here that talk about another post. Just do it there. Please, just talk to me about the layout. And vote on the polls. But do both! There's no 'or' option here.

ix

No, not nine.

I changed my display name!

No one, except Blessy ever calls me Mally, so 'twas kind of ridiculous to keep it. And it wasn't aesthetically right.

So, I have changed it. To Mallix.

See, I don't really have a nickname back home. Meaning LA. Meaning given by friends. You see, on the first day of every school year, I completely eagerly anticipate roll call, so I can hear my name mangled and then incorrectly correct the teacher. I tell 'em :"Mallika," the first syllable pronounced like a shopping mall. But in reality, the first syllable is pronounced "mull" like "I mulled it over and decided not to pronounce your name as Malleeeka." Ahem.

I don't bother giving that form of my name [Yes, I've now come to regard my true name as having two forms], as it's really hard for non-at-least-semi-Hindi speakers. People tend to overcompensate and it comes out like "Mule-ika." I'm not an ass, though you may be. I get too happy when I think of insults. Kinda ruins the effect.

The worst is when people correct subs for me, with such a disdainful attitude and like they know me so well. Yeah, it's my own fault that they use this Ikea form of my name [Digression: You know why I said Ikea even though it's not really a mall? Well, in sixth grade we had a sub called Mr. Morrisey. The first thing that greeted us when we walked in was 'The More I See, The More I Like' inscribed on the board. Uh. And then he wasted 20 minutes getting us to write 'clever' phrases to preserve our names in the collective consciousness instead of handing us the thing on Imhotep and Zsosor and the step pyramid that we were supposed to read. And I came up with something horrible like 'The Senator gave a speech next to the mall, Ikea.' But he was right. We never did forget his name]. And I don't mind it, actually, because I'm so used to it and it was of my own choosing. So please! Keep calling me that. My problem is I'm usually annoyed with whoever corrects my name and I usually mumble "I can speak for myself!" Kinda pointless. But you can correct it for me if you know I never get annoyed with you. Just not on the first day. Actually, just disregard this whole roll call business. I sound like a Mule-ika.

ANYWAY, back to the point seventy thousand paragraphs ago. There's not much you can do in terms of nicknames with the Fox Hills/Westfield Culver City version. Mally sounds like Molly. Mall sounds like, well, a mall.

So, that's why I'm broadcasting the version-that-my-parents-named-me form so you can see where my various family-given nicknames are derived from. But I'm not going to list them. But Mallix is one of them.

Pronounce it "Mull-iks."

AND the best part is that it ends in -ix. Like Goscinny and Uderzo's Gauls. I'm an Indomitable Gaul. Like Asterix and Getafix and lil Dogmatix. And let's not forget Cacofonix. 'cept only the men had -ixs, but all the women in the comics were insufferable, so I can be sufferable and thus earn the -ix.

Ironically, the Gaulish women all had names ending in -a.

Sorry, and You Should Be Ashamed

Dear Anonymice et co.,

Aren't I clever?

That's why you read my blog, right?

Unless you read it to scoff at me and my wonderful run on sentences that are absolutely okay because they make sense and are not confusing.

If your reason is the lator, quit PATRONIZING me and get off this sight.

Pffft.

On a more realistic note, since I have abandoned the notion that I should apologize in every post for my writing, I have a very serious message to convey to you. After I apologize for not updating when I say I will. But that's actually what I want to focus on. I've finally bloody updated and now I get no response. You ungrateful gits. Hmph.

With love,

Mallika

Naaah

1750 hrs

Me: We're going to Prithvi Cafe now? Isn't dinner soon?

Sai di: {incredulous expression} Soon?!

Me:...What time do you eat dinner in India?

Sai di: After 8:30?

Well it's worth the wait. It's been 10 months since the end of my last India trip, so I cannot be chastised too severely for forgetting the notion of Indian Standard Time. IST= an hour after what is conventionally normal/stated in invitation. Here follows an example:

-Arre yaar, come over at 8:30 for dinner.

{Show up at 10 pm}

-Ach, you're so early!

So, I'm back from the cafe place and from a 9:30 Italian dinner that ended at 10:45. You get the idea.

I am in India until the beginning of September and thus am able to justifiably renege on my promise to blog regularly to Anonymous on the previous post. Who is not going to love my writing style blah blah blah after this. Yo. My theory is that this person is my relative, most likely my father, as it is quite true that NO ONE reads my blog. Most of my 8 followers probably haven't ventured into this dusty attic of cyberspace in months. Feeling the love, guys.

I've been going to India at least once every year since I was a wee lass. It works out to a trip every 8 months or so. The minimum stay is 6 days, for my cousin-sister's weddings, and the max has been 7 weeks or so. OH I JUST REMEMBERED. IN YOUR FACE TEAM ITALY. HA. A-n-y-way, this trip'll be about 9-10 weeks.

And so two weeks after writing the above, lemme finish. I go on the computer every two days. I need to post something because there is a dearth of posts on this blog. So either tomorrow, since it is the weekend, or Monday, I shall write a lovely post about my adventures in Bombay NOT MUMBAI AS YOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU ARE A DEVOTED FOLLOWER. I know you're out there. Somewhere.

And I am now- well, in 2.5 hrs- going to watch the Germany-Uruguay match which is at bloody midnight. Which Germany will win. Because they're 'mazing. And because Muller {what the hell I can't find the bloody umlaut thing}is awesometastic and will definitely win the Best Young Play thingamagigy and Klose needs to beat Brazilian Ronaldo who had traumatizing teeth. Actually, the whole German starting XI is pretty awesome. I memorized them for fun. I have strange definitions.

ANYWAY, check out : twitter.com/modernoddity for my #badklosepuns tag which failed horribly. Yes, I'm slightly less ashamed of my twitter feed now. Slightly. And by the way, my apologies go out to my friend who was included in all the subsequent replies to my call for help with the tag due to the 'reply all' feature.

D-d-dare I say/I miss LA?

Technical Difficulties

The editing could certainly use some work. Twas just an experiment.

Of course I didn't write when I promised. But this time 'twas only two days off the proposed date. Progress, eh?

I have decided I shall blame this "radio" silence on my wonderfully spazzy computer. As with everything, there is a looong story behind this, which I shall attempt to coherently tell...after informing you that my writing style is converging to a hybrid state of conversational-like/way too formal so...I don't know what that point of that is. I'm also going to quit apologizing for writing quality. If you like it, you like it. If you don't...I don't like you! There! It's probably getting annoying for y'all to consistently read stupid apologies, so yup. Now to the story...

It all started on Tuesday, which I spent at home, properly sick for the first time in years. In the spirit of mundanity, let me tell you that I woke up while first period was still in progress, so way too early in my opinion. I watched way too much NBC programming, catching up on the Thursday night comedies I missed because I was studying for the APs. Well only one [hm, maybe a post later?].

Then, I felt like listening to music. But listening to it properly. Which means, good music, whole album, pure, etcetera.

I go through phases in music, but they all centre around genres of rock. Last year was my Queen and U2 phase. You should know that I never abandon an artist, as demonstrated through my attachment to ABBA, courtesy of my seven-year-old self. So I still think that Freddie Mercury and Bono are two of the greatest vocalists ever.

And the Edge is awesome and don't you dare disagree.

But lately, I've been leaning towards psychedelic/prog rock [By progressive rock I mean like the space-y, canvas-y kind]. So I decided to spend my day making YouTube playlists of Pink Floyd albums, using mon ami Wikipedia. Out of the legit albums [i.e., not Greatest Hits], I have only 'Wish You Were Here' and 'Dark Side of the Moon.'

So I made playlists for three albums I didn't have[and I'm going to quit talking about the music because I could go on], and was enjoying myself delaying my term paper very much until a little more than halfway through 'The Wall' my computer decided to rebel. The first sign of trouble came in the form of a new tab in Safari every time I clicked on something. Then when I clicked on the iChat icon in the dock, it opened up its folder in Applications. This happened with every app. So I restarted my computer. Then strange things happened with my login screen which I'm getting bored recounting. It took a goof thirty minutes, but I thought I fixed the problem with my amazing skills [I'm not joking, I've fixed everything else before]. Until it happened again a couple of hours later.

The funny part was that these tech problems forced me to pay attention to my research paper, so it was, in a way, a boon.

Until it refused to work properly for the next few days. Then, my father took matters in to his own hands and now dear old Macky's workin' just dandy. Please cross your fingers. After all, if this becomes uncooperative again, you wouldn't be able to read new posts by yours truly. And that would just be a shame.

Inspired?

I have found that it's hard to start at the beginning for anything, be it post titles or article ledes. I like that spelling.

And, subsequently, the beginning of blog posts, itself. If you are reading this for the first time, or even if you're not, you should know that I have the tendency to digress and meander. That might not seem like a good thing, but it entertains me when I reread these. I'm also stating this because I shall not write "I digress" each time now, unless 'tis for 'dramatic' effect. Nor shall I try and explain everything. See sidebar, cryptic > obvious.

I would also like to apologize [I am such a fake. A poseur *gasp* even(read other posts to comprehend the full horror of this statement). I have previously stated my affinity for the Queen's English, yet I spelled 'apologize' as 'apologize' as opposed to 'apologise'] for the currently less-than-stellar [as evidenced by that whole spiel [sp?] in brackets] writing.

Searching through old drafts, I found this gem of a post from late January, which I've decided to attempt to expand. The new stuff starts after this brief interlude.

Anyway... You know here's the other thing. People often [and dude, what's up with saying 'ofTen' instead of 'offin'] say "anyways" instead of "anyway." I'm guilty of this offense as well, but when you think about it it makes no sense to pluralize it. 'Way' refers to 'path,' so it's like if you were to say "Oh, Marion, whichever ways you choose you're never going to end up with a stupid name like John." But that makes no sense. Because young Marion chose a WAY, and ditched his name, which, by the way is my awesome fifth grade teacher's name, in favour of the supposedly manlier 'John Wayne' and see how his life turned out! He has an airport in Orange County named after him!

What was I saying?

See kids, this is why you don't drink black coffee during fifth period, let it cool to much, try and add brown sugar, and then allow Splenda packets to be within the reach of certain people who will pour more than a few into said drink. Yech.

P.S. Honestly. Expect a post tomorrow. Actually, a few. Or on Friday.